Don't Call It Early

Hey everyone. Today I wanted to share with you an experience I had at my last author event, what happened, and how I feel about it.

Almost two weeks ago, I had a multi-author event that I had a ton of anxiety over. A ton of self doubt. Leading up to the event, I kept feeling like I wasn't prepared enough, or that I was missing something. That feeling didn't go away. I was so worried about making sure I had everything ready. When I got there, I set up, and then I kept looking at my display wondering what I should change. I worried that people wouldn't be drawn to my table. I worried that my books looked bad.

Two hours into the event, I hadn’t sold a single book, while the romance authors around me were selling bunches.

I felt inadequate. Like I didn’t belong there. I've done several multi-author events, and ended up doing near 20 events last year. Even after doing so many events, writing and releasing so many books, this feeling, these worries... well, they still come around pretty often.

During this event, I even had one lady talk about “self” publishing in that way that many people still do, the way that tells you in their eyes, you’ll never measure up, even to those who are “traditionally published” under a small imprint or vanity press that still have to do all the work to sell their books.

But here’s the thing.

I ended up selling 18 books at that event. I sold 4 complete sets for Bound before the third book in the trilogy even technically released. I brought in over 400 dollars in the last 2 hours of that event. 

I left still feeling a little weird about how things had gone, but then I remembered something that helped me so much. I wrote these books. I put my soul into them, and I’m working hard to get them out in the world. I “self” publish because I want to choose what happens with my book, where it goes, what it looks like, and I don’t want all the money to go into someone else’s pockets. 

That’s my choice. It’s not because I couldn’t get an agent, or a publisher never wanted me. Truly, I've never submitted my work to a traditional or hybrid publisher, because I know what I want for my work. So I made my own path by founding AzureStar Press. 

You can too. Keep doing things the way you feel in your gut they need to be done. Trust yourself. Keep working at it, even if your efforts are made in small spurts. Put yourself out there. Keep trying. Every choice you make, every thing you try, is building toward something. Don’t let it slip, and please don't call it early. You never know how things might turn around if you keep going.

Your words matter. Your work matters. YOU matter.

I'll write again. Until then, stay awesome out there.